SATIRE: Ditch Your Smartphone and Embrace the Landline



Txanton Chertudi, Staff Writer

As technology progresses, features of past technologies are removed. New trends come and go. However, some stay, and the movement sticks, and the one on the rise is the comeback of landlines. A whole generation has missed out on the features that came with the landline telephone. Today’s youth are constantly texting. On the landline, there isn’t even the temptation to text. Freshman Noah Gremmert said, “Yeah, I enjoy being tethered to a wall. I’m tired of the silly abbreviations in text messages. Why text when you can call?” The past had it right about not being able to communicate without talking.

Why has the landline fallen off despite its inherent superiority over the smartphone? Laziness. Everything is at one’s fingertips, making us too reliant on smartphones that heavily depend on invisible waves called wifi. Good old landlines are directly plugged into walls and have so much more variety in design than the smartphone, and the best thing yet is that they don’t need to be recharged. Sophomore Collin Beckstead said, “I miss the style of the landline. Everyone can tell that you’re occupied. The cell phone keeps and holds onto your attention, and on the landline, once the call is over, its purpose is met”. Countless hours are saved when your sole communication, apart from email, is the landline! Another benefit to the landline is that it’s less likely to keep your attention. By putting down smartphones and picking up a landline, we can rediscover the lost art of conversation and enjoy a more productive and satisfying way of communication. So put down your smartphone and pick up a landline.