SATIRE: Creativity Lab Secrets



Sawyer Dawson, Staff Writer

Everybody loves the Creativity Lab. The fun of building advanced models and machines, the thrill of learning more advanced technology, and the building of strong friendships have created a better education for students. However, “The Lab” may have more behind it than meets the eye. No one knows what they do in their spare time, even if they claim to work on their projects.  This caught the attention of the LDSRA; Let’s Do Something Random Agency, an organization founded by a secret group of students, and they set a task to find out what they are up to. 

The LDSRA decided to send junior Caleb Randall to investigate and try to find anything out of the ordinary. Randall didn’t return until the next week and had some terrifying news. “I heard that they were building a way to communicate with government officials,” he says, “They have even destroyed WIFI antennas and ACs during the construction of it and who knows what that is doing to the school.” Creativity Lab is building some sort of governmental communications base and the construction of it has damaged air conditioning and Network connections, leading to poorly conditioned rooms and unstable WIFI connections. The LDSRA wanted to ask Randall some more questions but it seems that, recently, he disappeared. There has been no trace of him and his parents have no idea where he is or whether he is still alive. 

The disappearance of Randall startled the LDSRA and only made them more interested in finding out more about the topic of the base. They decided that they would send out junior Isaac Dawson, they seem to like using the juniors, to find the entrance to the base and collect information as to how to get rid of it. Dawson, however, didn’t return. The LDSRA found him at his house, clearly trying to stay out of sight. They questioned him about what he had done but he refused to let anything slip. The only thing that he told us was, “Rung where the chairs have hung” before he jumped aboard a plane and took off for Africa. We still don’t know what he means by this, but we know, for sure, that the communications base is extremely dangerous. The LDSRA advises all to stay away from the roof and try to prevent others from falling into an undetermined future that could possibly make you board a plane to nowhere in particular.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you!